A few weeks ago, we took to the road to attend my Uncle Dennis’ funeral in Chicago. He was the youngest and last of the three brothers in my Dad’s family.
3 Brothers, 3 Uncles, 3 Dads
My Aunt Dolores, as the baby in the family, is now the sole surviving sibling. Most everyone is sitting at that Family Table up in heaven now…
“Ma, this is what I wanted to play for you the day before you passed away; I wanted you to be the first to hear it – finally finished and ready to record – I wanted you to know – to feel me there with you, to be a part of your leaving us. Me. But I was too afraid…It’s taken me this long to understand why. Somehow deep inside I thought if I could play it for you, it would work its musical magic and you’d awaken – and be back with all of us. I couldn’t face you awakening somewhere else, someplace I couldn’t go along with you.”
me, 2008
Afterwards, on the way back home from Chicago somewhere in Kentucky, our 2003 Toyota Camry reached a milestone 444,444 miles. We’re getting closer to our return trip from the moon – it is now at 445,685, only 4,315 (at perigee) miles left to go!
My Saturday Project:
Baked up a batch of my “Laura’s Lovelies” – thusly named by Amy-next-door during a ‘circle’ block party (we lived on a cul-de-sac) in the old neighborhood ~ Lafayette, CO circa 1988.
My Sunday Project:
Eating above Saturday Project – with multiple cups of java of course! 🙂
According to those in the know ‘sus’ means suspicious.
When author/editor (and friend) L.Marie posted about current slang used among teens, the term ‘sus’ came up.
My comment to that post went as follows:
“Sus (suspicious)” HA! Had to laugh at this one. As a musician, ‘sus’ is common reference to a suspended chord and/or melodic line suspension. Often said, Csus7 as an example; or There’s a sus on measure 3, forth note.
My comment to L.Marie’s post on current slang
That’s my simplified attempt at using ‘sus’ in a sentence. As a musical, technical, theoretical term go here & here for explanations and examples of suspension.
Excerpts from pop music of where different ‘sus’ chords are used can be heard in the video to the left. Keeping in mind that this is a composition technique used in many other forms/styles of music.
The beauty of this particular musical sound is that once heard, most listeners regardless of musical acumen recognize this in whatever genre of music it is heard.
That sound can now be connected to its name – suspension, or ‘sus’.
Over the course of a long love story, what was once a single ‘our song’ becomes a whole playlist of songs. Marking myriad events in the ups, downs; ebbs, flows; crushing sorrows, magnificent joys; everyday living out of our love & life in this world hand-in-hand and in His Hands.
Here then, is one such song released in August, 1983 and added at that same time to our playlist during a particularly defining event that occurred early on in our life path together.
The year was 1983.
We were renting the bottom unit in a quadplex in the heart of the Silicon Valley – San Jose, CA. Hubby pursuing the dream of working for the hottest tech company of the time, Hewlett Packard.
Me? Living life in the Bay area as a new stay-at-home-college-educated Mom of a one-year-old and precariously on track with our fourth pregnancy.
A seemingly viable one after a rocky reproductive history of 2 previous miscarriages: one around 15 weeks (twins) and later, an early ectopic pregnancy that spontaneously resolved itself. Nestled between those, our much wanted beloved daughter, Hava was born!
Over the course of this latest pregnancy at 5 months gestation, the increasingly troublesome eye blind-spot symptoms I was experiencing could no longer be ignored. At the end of my eye exam, the optometrist explained that he ‘could not be responsible for me’ and felt he couldn’t tell me his suspicions on the cause of my blind spots. (Yes, he was an odd duck) Instead, he promptly picked up the phone and scheduled an appointment for me with a neurologist colleague ASAP.
Thus began the whirlwind of expedient & lengthy testing.
Of course, the neurologist explained further concerns at the next day’s appointment. It appears my symptoms suggested two possible diagnoses:
Neither a good choice or something to hope for. But we prayed for the best along with a miraculous intervention.
Apparently, Pituitary Gland Brain Tumors grow exponentially & rapidly if the patient is pregnant – hence the haste with which these medical professionals carried out their testing and treatment plans.
I underwent numerous tests that lasted hours over a two day period prior to an impending operation date within 10-14 days. It was assumed I had the tumor and several tests substantiated those assumptions.
Between sessions, I talked with my OB-GYN to make sure that the scheduled CAT scans (MRIs weren’t readily available at that time) wouldn’t hurt the new life growing inside me.
They wouldn’t.
Further, the doctor spent time patiently answering my flood of ‘what if’ and ‘what about’ questions – mostly focused on how to protect my unborn child from harm during possible brain surgery.
And you know what? My OB-GYN made a point of letting me know that prenatal care is as much for the care of the mother (me) as for the baby! He was there for me, too. Every step of the way.
A few days before the looming ‘possible’ brain surgery was to be performed, the latest CAT scans baffled the medical staff. The original tumor dot cluster seemingly disappeared!
Even the neurologist said it was unexplainable (often their way of acknowledging a miracle of sorts).
So they cancelled the immediate mandate to operate post haste.
That left us with diagnosis #2 … which at the time was only confirmed via a spinal tap. I asked if we could postpone that until after the baby was born and/or indefinitely and was told, “Yes”.
Relief. We’d deal with it later, if at all.
Now we could celebrate and enjoy getting ready for our new arrival.
Aside from periodic monitoring with a world renown Neuro-ophthalmologist* at Stanford, I ultimately ended up with a clean slate.
Sadly, I miscarried again**, this time at 6 months gestation.
But the Lord has been my (our) stronghold, And my (our) God the rock of my (our) refuge.
Psalm 94:22 NASB
*there’s an hilarious story that goes with our visit with this doctor, but isn’t quite in line with the focus of this post – perhaps another time it will be told!
**for completion’s sake, we went through 4 more pregnancies, resulting in 2 more live births (middle daughter and youngest son) but losing 2 more babies at 12 weeks gestation each. In total, 9 babies, with 3 live births. All wanted. All beloved.
Love, Harp Guitars, Oatmeal Scotchies…and back again to love.
February is the love month.
You know, the 14th is St Valentine’s Day and all of that.
In our family, holiday celebrations often last longer than the actual 24-hour day. Hence, here it is a few days after the 14th and yes, hubby and I are still enjoying the love month.
What’s that got to do with harp guitars and cookies? Bear with me. I’m in one of those ‘everything’s interconnected’ type of mind right now.
I remember when I saw my first harp guitar.
It was hanging on a wall at McCabe’s in Santa Monica, CA.
The same time and place where I strummed that special resonator hubby encouraged me to get, but I declined.
McCabe’s is a wonderous place. Museum-like with vintage stringed instruments hanging on walls in rooms filled with bookcases of sheet music and racks of pick-me-up-and-try-me instruments for sale. Bustling with the local musician community of both the vintage and newbie type, too.
Scroll up to 2020/2021.
I found an orchestra made up entirely of harp guitars playing The Water Is Wide in a virtual performance on-line.
It touched me deeply while in the midst of ‘lockdown’.
A folk song of Scottish origin…
…which brings me to the oatmeal scotchies.
Get it? 🙂
Every so often, I get a hankering for something butterscotchey. Simply popping a Werther’s wasn’t going to satisfy this time around. So, the handful of butterscotch baking chips I had leftover from who knows how long ago, got baked up recently in a batch of oatmeal scotchies.
The recipe (on the back of the chip package) calls for 1 2/3 cup of those chips, but I had to supplement them with leftover choco chips and walnuts to come to the 1 2/3 cup requirement. Along with my normal adjustments on commercial cookie recipes – replacing the flour, baking powder/soda and some of the salt with self-rising flour and swapping out ½ cup of the 1 cup of butter with ½ cup of Crisco – I also decided to continue adjusting the recipe by replacing ½ t of the 1 t vanilla with ½ t orange extract.
Yeah, that’s how I follow a recipe.
However, believe me, those cookies turned out fresher & brighter because of that vanilla-orange combo.
The water is wide I cannot get over Neither have I wings to fly Give me a boat that can carry two And both shall row, my love and I
…purchased downloads from Amazon digital music a long, long time ago.
I ‘own’ these three pieces, but can’t offer them in total to you the listener as a share on my blog…interesting. This embed of Amazon’s ‘share’ include only excerpts. Click here for my ‘First Purchased Download’ List but then – you have to sign in/up to listen.
However, as another vehicle for sharing, I offer up the three pieces in their respective youtube embeds for your enjoyment!
note: I suppose you, my regular followers, noticed I’m not exactly rushing to finish up my ‘part 3’ of the Catching Up blog postings…it’ll come, just not now! 🙂Please forgive my indolence in this matter!Blame it on the Unending Summer Heat Wave of 2022. Stay safe & cool, all.
Swimming with Swans: The Music – Goat Suite (Saga) is officially released today, 3/11/2022
Brief background of this piece:
Smack dab in the middle of our three-year journey between homes experience, my husband & I lived on the compound in the desert outside Las Cruces, NM, by invitation of family members grieving the loss of a young child. We shared life with various ‘rescues’ of both the animal and human sort. Inspired by our family of rescue goats, their antics and their care for us as we cared for them and initially based upon musical intervals of their bleats, my GS(S) stands as an ‘homage’ to Mama Goat and her kids. In addition, it gives voice to the fact that those of us who have experienced or are currently in a period of displacement in a living situation or even state of mind, are not defined by that but live day-by-day, create works of beauty regardless, and share it with all who will listen.[Dedicated to Justice Marie Norwood (1/30/2008-8/26/2010)- a child filled with light & delight, never to be forgotten.]
Hop over to my Bandcamp page for details on how to order digital tracks and/or physical cds.
…I set an official Release Date: 3/11/2022. I notified my digital distributor* for them to do what they do while I continued doing what I needed to do In the Meantime.
In the Meantime, I finished my Bandcamp storefront with a Pre-Order option for both digital and physical formats along with a free listen to the first movement of my Swimming with Swans: The Music – Goat Suite (Saga).
Pretty nifty, eh? Not just the music (!), but the fact that I can actually embed my Bandcamp music player here in a post on my WP site. Along with that you’ll notice I added a cool button that allows you to ‘Follow’ me there if you so desire.
Now about that Release Date. Yep. It’s still 3/11/2022 for all intents and purposes. However, my distribution service notified me that their side of things will be delayed…so they dropped the ball on the whole ‘release date’ thing as it applies to their delivery to on-line streaming & selling sites.
Oh well.
Because this is my music, my unveiling, my personal pinnacle of an announcement, I still claim 3/11/2022 as my release date. Sooooo…Friday is the party! My distro service may be late to that party, but eventually they will get my music out there where their services promised it to be distributed. I’ll let you know when I get updates on all of that.
In the Meantime, stay tuned here and on my Bandcamp site!
*cdbaby is the (paid for) distro service I’m using for them to send my Swimming with Swans: The Music – Goat Suite (Saga) to streaming & selling companies such as Spotify, Pandora, YouTube, etc. So my music is basically available free for the listening once they deliver the files to those platforms (and others) as well as being available for purchase on platforms such as iTunes, Amazon, etc. According to the latest update from cdbaby, there’s a delay on their end of things for a formal release on the 3/11/2022 date. All that means is that those sites won’t have it available for streaming/etc until whenever cdbaby gets their side of things cleared up. Nothing I can do about all of that – but darn!
“The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.” – John 1:5
These past few years I’ve been heavy on the ‘longest night’ part of reflecting upon life’s unfolding during the winter solstice. So herein I am pondering more of the ‘shortest day’ side of things.
I like sitting this side of the solstice – winter’s frozen heartbeat on the cusp of a new beginning. Almost but not quite on the other side of darkness.
Those are the things any day can bring – and are especially darkness busting on The Shortest Day.
Offerings I grasp onto, hoping to not miss any scrap of sunshine put out there to encourage me along the way through.
This year’s ‘shortest day’ forced its way into my brain. Insisting I pause, recognize and think on the myriad kaleidoscope bright spots, glimmers and slanting glow-rays of MMXXI.
From getting vaxxed, which enabled something as simple as getting a haircut and grabbing my first coffee at the new shop in town, to meeting up with a quilter-blogger buddy for the first time face-to-face at her home (and fantastic quilting studio) in NC. Plus numerous road trips made to Michigan and Chicago…mostly for fun, family gatherings, but also one that included sharing the grief with family due to the passing of my Aunt Adua.
In many cases, what was interrupted by 2020’s COVID crisis began to re-start this year in different ways…for our son that meant ‘how to get engaged, married and go on a honeymoon’ during a Pandemic. The beginning of the Pandemic caught him and his girlfriend hiking the Patagonia wilderness – a miracle story in and of itself of how they even got back on American soil…They are now honeymooning in Thailand.
🙂
In conclusion (!), the following just seems to put ‘the shortest day’ and ‘the longest night’ into a sort of musical representation of what I’m trying to convey in this winter solstice pondering – give it a listen.
“There are more than 7 wonders of the world – he (Stevie Wonder) is #8.”
Angelo Roman
Innervisions – Stevie Wonder
One of my favorite albums during my college years (1972-1977). Here’s a studio clip on recording ‘Living for the City’ which is as fresh and (unfortunately) relevant to today’s issues as it was then… all (he)artistically mastered by a master. What follows is the whole song as recorded on Innervisions.
For a touch of relief in this world of many troubles and plenty of social injustices I end this with Stevie’s “Don’t You Worry About A Thing” on this same album, Innervisions.