Category: Agrodolce Vita (Page 1 of 8)

yes, life is bittersweet

RIP Robert Redford

September 29, 2025 / laura bruno lilly / 34 Comments

please note: scroll/read to the end to discover who won the giveaway.

Robert Redford – August 18, 1936 – September 16, 2025
movie star, director, producer and film champion, heartthrob, environmentalist, philanthropist, family man, political activist, person of consequence and (he)artistic everyman

Movie star, director, producer and film champion

Most are acquainted with these aspects of Robert Redford’s legacy. I’ve seen most of his commercial movies close to their release dates on the big screen and enjoyed 90% of them. I’ve seen a few Sundance films and love the vibe of the whole festival. Here I’ll just highlight a few of my fav commercial movies from the RollingStone article, Robert Redford: 20 Essential Movies. note: hover over the arrow and click for more

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

released in 1969 – I saw this on the big screen at the Boulder Theater in 1970. Let the adventures & heartthrobs, begin!

Downhill Racer

released in 1969 – I saw this for free at the Chautauqua Theater summer film series in 1970 as a concessions worker! Of course, this attracted a large local following due to its relatable Colorado skiing vibe.

Jeremiah Johnson

released in 1972 – I love this movie because Dad loved this movie. One of Dad’s favorite Mountain Man Adventures that we saw together as a family on the big screen at the Boulder Theater.

All the President’s Men

released in 1976 – Based on the non-fiction book by Bernstein & Woodward, the two journalists investigating the Watergate Scandal for the Washington Post during the Nixon presidency. Of note: in 2010, this film was selected for preservation in the US National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant.” Let’s hope it stays there.

The Horse Whisperer

released in 1998 – The scenery, subject matter and silence were seminal. In fact, the silence in the movie house ( a large commercial movie theater) was as silent as the movie itself – novel concept these days, eh? I saw this on Date Night with hubby, leaving our 3 kids with a babysitter for the evening.

The Old Man and the Gun

released in 2018 – On my list of films to watch!

Heartthrob

Let me tell you, I didn’t usually go for the blonde & blue. Growing up, I much preferred Dino (blueblack/blackbrown, plus he felt like family) to Frankie (light brown/blue).

Even back in my preteen days of watching The Man From U.N.C.L.E on TV I chose Napoleon Solo over Ilya Kuryakin…even if Ilya was more youthful.

Of even greater significance is that my longstanding Beatle of choice has always been a toss up between George & John. Well, truth be told, I loved all four of them!

During my later college years, Billy Dee Williams as Brian Walker in Mahogany, and as Lando Calrissian in Star Wars was it for me. But in between all of that, when Newman & Redford hit the big screen with Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, I knew Redford was the ‘best’.*

Of course, looks aren’t everything…

So when my middle daughter called to say she saw that RR had passed away, she noted at the end, “I’m sorry, Ma. I know he was your heartthrob”. Geez, was it that obvious?!

Environmentalist, philanthropist, family man, political activist

I can’t speak to the family man aspect of his life, but in reading various articles it becomes clear how much family life informed his career and life focus. That said, below is a good example of thoughtful consideration of current issues with his trademark pointed yet mellow activist attitude.

“Journalism is what keeps politics straight. Is politics telling the truth or not, you know, and very often politics doesn’t tell the truth. It just tells a story that’s being told by one side or the other. But it’s journalism that gets to the bottom line and says, wait a minute, we’re hearing this, we’re hearing that, but what’s the truth? You know I think we’re into that now.”
Robert Redford, circa 2017

Person of consequence and (he)artistic everyman

Okay, here’s where there’s a bit of a stretch of these attributes as applied to my personal story…

Once upon a time, during my freshman year at CU Boulder, I learned the Legend of Robert Redford - a former student who got wrapped up in the party scene and got himself expelled from the University. Of course, the fact that he went on to 'find himself' backpacking through Europe and emerged a creatively contributing member of society only served to reinforce the pull to do the 'drop out' thing for countless others of my generation. Of which I thankfully didn't succumb. Though I still yearn for my personal Camino Adventure!

Somewhere along the line I ventured deep into the nooks and crannies of "The Sink" on the Hill intent on searching out his autograph/comment on its graffiti laden walls. Meh. Not much to look at, but I can say I saw it in its original form. Nay, I can say I touched the space he wrote upon! 😍
As a rite of passage, I even took my middle daughter to view the graffiti wall her senior year in High School.
The Legend lives on.

PS: The Sundance Institute is coming home to Boulder in 2027.

RIP Robert Redford.

*at the time, the question was routinely posed: who’s the most handsome/best actor – Newman or Redford?

As promised, the winner of the “When Things Go Missing” giveaway is hereby officially announced: Tierney! Congrats – your book is in the snail mail. Thanks to everyone who showed such enthusiastic interest in Deborah’s debut novel.

ShoutOut: “When Things Go Missing” by Deborah J. Brasket

September 18, 2025 / laura bruno lilly / 43 Comments

Mini Review: When Things Go Missing by Deborah J. Brasket

Sitting cross-legged on the bed as Franny sorts through old journals and piles of stuff, I was there with her. As she discards pieces of her life no longer relevant to who she has become or where she wants to be, I was ushered into the world of the story which followed. The story of When Things Go Missing by Deborah Brasket.

This initial relatability of Franny’s character enabled me to ease into the unique family dynamics of living with an addicted adult child. Slice of life stories recounted by each member of the family – Franny (mother), Walter (father), Cal (son) and Kay (daughter) – interconnect yet move forward independent of each family member. Except Cal. The addict. Making little to no movement forward in his life, always dependent on others even during periods of recovery.

Thus, the family itself is in a constant state of uncertain flux, with personal growth and goals being held back by varying degrees over the years. The conundrum of living with and loving an addict.

As the first ‘thing’ to go missing, Franny upsets the tenuous dysfunctional family status quo. She spontaneously packs a light bag, her camera and snacks, then begins driving down the coastal highway with no destination in mind. How each family member copes and changes during her disappearance is the gist of the story. How Deborah crafts the story is what kept this reader, reading.

With the development of each character, I see the world through their eyes and think their thoughts. Getting into their heads coupled with action imagery in the narrative, they each speak their own story as it unfolds in the novel. A good example of this is in the scene where Kay’s new boyfriend unexpectedly arrives early at her apartment.

“You can’t be here already. I wasn’t expecting you this soon.” Her hands fly to her ponytail, pulling her hair free. She looks down at the dirty sweats she’s wearing and then at the mess in her apartment. Kay doesn’t do neat… “Tell me you’re kidding. You’re not really here. Not yet. Please.” She peels off her sweats and squirms into a pair of jeans. He laughs. “It’s true, I’m really here.” “Then wait… I’ll be out in a few minutes,” she tells him, kicking her dirty sweats into the closet.

This same immersive style of writing intensifies the overwhelming realities of Cal’s lifestyle as an addict. Deborah’s descriptions of the “matrix that holds everything together” – the people that make life on the streets as an addict possible – are visceral yet understandable to one not engulfed by those realities.

Glimpses of Cal as seen through his mother, sister, father, and assorted street people are woven into a complicated tapestry, expertly balancing his ‘endearing qualities’ with how those same qualities act as enabling his continuous vicious circle of addiction.

With scant softening around the edges, Deborah speaks – writes – with grit and grace.

Luckily for this reader, the story does not end there. There is much to relish from start to finish throughout the book. Nor does the novel come to an abrupt ending – hastily tying loose ends together for the sake of completion. It is not a fairy tale ending, but a workable ending. Addiction never truly goes away. People and relationships are always evolving. But the desire to stay connected with those we love is an ever-present driving force.

As in real life, we are all works in progress.

After sailing around the world with her husband and children, teaching literature to college students, and fighting for affordable housing as the leader of a nonprofit, Deborah J Brasket finally settled down among the golden hills and vineyards of California’s central coast to write the kinds of novels she loves to read.

When Things Go Missing available at Amazon, Bookshop, Barnes & Noble.

As promised, one lucky commenter will receive a free copy of When Things Go Missing. Comment below to be entered into a drawing. Randomly selected winner to be announced sometime next week.

Remember My “Ankara Reward” Tactic?

August 2, 2025 / laura bruno lilly

Well, it’s come in handy as a transitional tool to ease into taking a break for most of August.

After weeks of teaching summer session lessons, following through with essential tasks, the editing/layout of my current Giving Voice series (part three is still in the works), and dealing with heat, heavy air and asthma, I’m ready to hit the pause button.

To refresh your memory, a little less than a year ago, I expounded on the virtues of a method I devised to help stay focused, motivated and balanced while working on specific music project goals. I set up a way to accrue points on time spent doing various aspects of specific items (ToDos) related to my primary music project Goals and translated them into ‘reward time’.

I called it the Ankara Reward because I’d been itching to play around with the Ankara fabric/Moda Grunge fabric combo I designated & set aside for a specific quilting project*.

Generically speaking the formula works like this: for x amount of time I spend on my priority/primary focus, I can then accrue y amount of minutes towards dedicated time for a certain other desirable activity focus.

Using this as a controlled ‘reward time’ helped when I was in a slump and needed motivation to keep going with my primary focus – music. It also served as a creative break that enabled me to return to my music with fresh eyes and an eager spirit.

Within weeks, I dropped the literal formula and flowed seamlessly from task to task. Making progress on ToDos, Goals, Tasks and plenty of Etc.s!

That said, musical goals are not as easily shared while in progress, so attached are some photos for you to see the Ankara Reward in progress.

left to right: 3 Ankara fabric finalists, chosen Ankara fabric, early piecing, first block with layout info, first block.

rolled up in noodle for easy storage — rolled up in noodle for storage

first section layout — rolled up in noodle for storage

stopping off point for now — **Stopping off point for now – July 31st, 2025**

*my friend Mary and I took an on-line lecture class together on Ankara Fabrics awhile back. She, true to her ‘Zippy’ moniker, whipped up her version in no time. Me? Like I’ve said before, I am a slow stitcher.

Priorities Over Chaos

April 22, 2025 / laura bruno lilly

Like many of you, I’m finding it difficult to post regularly. For whatever reason, and there are many significant factors involved, it’s just how things are for me right now. An easing back into the blogging rhythm just hasn’t presented itself before now.

I’ve noticed several bloggers I follow have courageously forged forth with timely posts echoing thoughts, hopes, struggles, fears and outrage similar to my own on the ceaseless chaos & cruelty that is bombarding the local & world stage.

One such blogger, Deborah Brasket, gave me a way to segue from my last post in February to today’s post.

In her post, Tending Beauty in an Uncertain World, she eloquently speaks of the tenuous balance she is trying to maintain in her (he)art, everyday life, and social responsibility.

“Like many of you, I struggle to balance myself in this uncertain world where the rule of law and so many institutions of democracy are crumbling around us. Where we are falling into fascism, failing to support human decency, our friends and allies, and the values that made America the land of the free and the home of the brave.

Like many, I falter between hope and despair. I struggle to know how to live this life I love as it is being destroyed from within.

Can I go on writing my novels, tending my garden, blogging about beauty, living a life of peace and tranquility? Do I abandon my piano, my artwork, my joy in living?

Do I take up arms and march in the streets? Can I do both? Will one taint the other? Will my joy be lessened, my rage take control?”
Deborah Brasket

I relate.

She found some insight in a poem by Gloria Horton-Young, The Quiet Art of Resistance.

I found some insight in a snippet from May Sarton’s journal entitled, At Seventy.

“It is order in all things that rests the mind…So what is the inward order that makes it possible to shut out the chaos around me as I sit here? Perhaps a strong sense of what my priorities are – first friends, then work, then the garden. If I died suddenly, how bitterly I should regret work undone, friends unanswered. As for the garden, that is my secret extravagance and one has to have one…The garden is where my madness lies, and that is a more useful madness than drunkenness or a tantrum…”
May Sarton

My priorities as per Sarton’s template?

First – family, friends and relationships (including my faith in a loving, caring God), then work- my music and all manner of my (he)art, then the garden – literally and all manner of other outlets.

There are other priorities, certainly…which makes for a good solid team in countering chaos & cruelty!

I am not going to give up on the beautiful and the good – I will not allow the ethos of the times to blur my vision or stifle my heart. Choosing priorities over chaos – sharing, caring, kindness, love, knowledge, truth – is exercising freedom in its purest sense.

“Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

Weekend Notes 9/14-15/2024

September 15, 2024 / laura bruno lilly

‘Start with Now’ is a good umbrella catchall phrase which describes my on & off approach to feeding the blog with sporadic & unscheduled posts…That said, let’s jump right in!

I sorted through my ‘Goals for 2024’ to where I’m on-track with some, delinquent in others. I am basically pleased with achieving a tenuous balance incorporating prioritized focused attention on specific ‘goals’ with living life in its everydayness adding spicey bits of fun, delight and love as opportunities arise.
I set up a way to accrue points on time spent doing various aspects of specific items related to my primary music project goals and translated them into ‘reward time’. I call it the Ankara Reward because I’ve been itching to play around with the Ankara fabrics I’ve teamed up with Moda Grunge fabrics designated for a specific quilting project. Using this as a controlled ‘reward time’ helps when I’m in a slump and need motivation to keep going with my music, but mostly it prevents me from going down a rabbit hole of avoidance pulling me away from my primary focus.
I learned a valuable lesson while using the Ankara Reward as a motivator/break from my primary music project goals: delayed gratification of a reward earned results in diminished joy in reaching that ‘reward’ and makes it feel less significant as a motivator as I continue with the focused tasks.
- Instead of planning a time to redeem my ‘reward’, I decided to forge ahead reasoning that I was on a roll and would be happy to indulge my reward at a later date. The problem with that? I had no idea this would lessen the positive aspects of achieving the ‘reward’ plus deplete my drive to continue with tasks related to the goals they were attached to!
  - I learned that delayed gratification has a limit for its usefulness – kind of a weird example of the law of diminishing returns.
I renewed my driver’s license and bought my ‘Real ID’ star. What’s amazing is that my license photo came out uber well!
I found a recent photo of myself to crop and use in a professional application. What’s amazing is that it came out uber well!
- take a peek: I added it to my ‘About’ page just for fun
My birthday month is fast approaching. I love my birthday month. But this year I’ll be tipping over the 9’s into my next decade of life…and if I’m honest…The tipping point is kinda hard for me this time around.

Weekend Notes 2/17-18/2024

February 18, 2024 / laura bruno lilly

A few weeks ago, we took to the road to attend my Uncle Dennis’ funeral in Chicago. He was the youngest and last of the three brothers in my Dad’s family.

3 Brothers, 3 Uncles, 3 Dads

My Aunt Dolores, as the baby in the family, is now the sole surviving sibling. Most everyone is sitting at that Family Table up in heaven now…

Ma’s bd day, February 6^th, recently came and went and I’m missing all of you guys…

also find this here

“Ma, this is what I wanted to play for you the day before you passed away; I wanted you to be the first to hear it – finally finished and ready to record – I wanted you to know – to feel me there with you, to be a part of your leaving us. Me.
But I was too afraid…It’s taken me this long to understand why. Somehow deep inside I thought if I could play it for you, it would work its musical magic and you’d awaken – and be back with all of us. I couldn’t face you awakening somewhere else, someplace I couldn’t go along with you.”
me, 2008

Afterwards, on the way back home from Chicago somewhere in Kentucky, our 2003 Toyota Camry reached a milestone 444,444 miles. We’re getting closer to our return trip from the moon – it is now at 445,685, only 4,315 (at perigee) miles left to go!

My Saturday Project:

Baked up a batch of my “Laura’s Lovelies” – thusly named by Amy-next-door during a ‘circle’ block party (we lived on a cul-de-sac) in the old neighborhood ~ Lafayette, CO circa 1988.

My Sunday Project:

Eating above Saturday Project – with multiple cups of java of course! 🙂

MMXXiii – part one

December 29, 2023 / laura bruno lilly

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.
Proverbs 4:23

It’s been quite the year, hasn’t it?

Played against the backdrop loop of escalating violence, senseless shootings, climate catastrophes, wars, heartbreaking stories of real people – multitudes – changed forever due to man’s inhumanity towards man. It’s difficult to not get overwhelmed.

And yet.

I am:

Learning to accept
That all hungers cannot be fed,
That saving the world
May be a matter
Of sowing a seed
Not overturning a tyrant,
That we do what we can.
The moment of vision,
The seizure still makes
Its relentless demands:
Work, love, be silent.
Speak.
The house of gathering (poem excerpt) – May Sarton circa 1988

I’ve been quiet of late. Not by choice. I’ve sat numerous times at the keyboard or with pen in hand struggling to put into words all that is streaming within my mind and heart to no avail.

But now as 2023 nears completion, I find it easier to recount certain of those events and revelations which occurred during the past year rather than as they were occurring!

Part of my year’s journey included the above ‘revelation’ which clearly set me up for greater freedom in living my ‘everyday life’.

That said, I hope to compile a ‘part two’ followup post which will highlight some of those ‘events & revelations’…but then, maybe not! 🙂

XLV

June 17, 2023 / laura bruno lilly

1978-2023 (and counting!)

June 17th.
Our 45th wedding anniversary.

Over the course of a long love story, what was once a single ‘our song’ becomes a whole playlist of songs. Marking myriad events in the ups, downs; ebbs, flows; crushing sorrows, magnificent joys; everyday living out of our love & life in this world hand-in-hand and in His Hands.

Here then, is one such song released in August, 1983 and added at that same time to our playlist during a particularly defining event that occurred early on in our life path together.

The year was 1983.

We were renting the bottom unit in a quadplex in the heart of the Silicon Valley – San Jose, CA. Hubby pursuing the dream of working for the hottest tech company of the time, Hewlett Packard.

Me? Living life in the Bay area as a new stay-at-home-college-educated Mom of a one-year-old and precariously on track with our fourth pregnancy.

A seemingly viable one after a rocky reproductive history of 2 previous miscarriages: one around 15 weeks (twins) and later, an early ectopic pregnancy that spontaneously resolved itself. Nestled between those, our much wanted beloved daughter, Hava was born!

Over the course of this latest pregnancy at 5 months gestation, the increasingly troublesome eye blind-spot symptoms I was experiencing could no longer be ignored. At the end of my eye exam, the optometrist explained that he ‘could not be responsible for me’ and felt he couldn’t tell me his suspicions on the cause of my blind spots. (Yes, he was an odd duck) Instead, he promptly picked up the phone and scheduled an appointment for me with a neurologist colleague ASAP.

Thus began the whirlwind of expedient & lengthy testing.

Of course, the neurologist explained further concerns at the next day’s appointment. It appears my symptoms suggested two possible diagnoses:

1. Pituitary Gland Brain Tumor

or

2. Early stage MS

Neither a good choice or something to hope for. But we prayed for the best along with a miraculous intervention.

Apparently, Pituitary Gland Brain Tumors grow exponentially & rapidly if the patient is pregnant – hence the haste with which these medical professionals carried out their testing and treatment plans.

I underwent numerous tests that lasted hours over a two day period prior to an impending operation date within 10-14 days. It was assumed I had the tumor and several tests substantiated those assumptions.

Between sessions, I talked with my OB-GYN to make sure that the scheduled CAT scans (MRIs weren’t readily available at that time) wouldn’t hurt the new life growing inside me.

They wouldn’t.

Further, the doctor spent time patiently answering my flood of ‘what if’ and ‘what about’ questions – mostly focused on how to protect my unborn child from harm during possible brain surgery.

And you know what? My OB-GYN made a point of letting me know that prenatal care is as much for the care of the mother (me) as for the baby! He was there for me, too. Every step of the way.

A few days before the looming ‘possible’ brain surgery was to be performed, the latest CAT scans baffled the medical staff. The original tumor dot cluster seemingly disappeared!

But we knew it was our ‘miraculous intervention!’

Even the neurologist said it was unexplainable (often their way of acknowledging a miracle of sorts).

So they cancelled the immediate mandate to operate post haste.

That left us with diagnosis #2 … which at the time was only confirmed via a spinal tap. I asked if we could postpone that until after the baby was born and/or indefinitely and was told, “Yes”.

Relief. We’d deal with it later, if at all.

Now we could celebrate and enjoy getting ready for our new arrival.

Aside from periodic monitoring with a world renown Neuro-ophthalmologist* at Stanford, I ultimately ended up with a clean slate.

Sadly, I miscarried again**, this time at 6 months gestation.

But the Lord has been my (our) stronghold,
And my (our) God the rock of my (our) refuge.
Psalm 94:22 NASB

*there’s an hilarious story that goes with our visit with this doctor, but isn’t quite in line with the focus of this post – perhaps another time it will be told!

**for completion’s sake, we went through 4 more pregnancies, resulting in 2 more live births (middle daughter and youngest son) but losing 2 more babies at 12 weeks gestation each. In total, 9 babies, with 3 live births. All wanted. All beloved.

Peace Post: leaving your mark

April 28, 2023 / laura bruno lilly

Glory in leaving your mark — leaving your mark by Joseph Farley

Shortest Day, Longest Night

December 21, 2021 / laura bruno lilly

“The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.” – John 1:5

These past few years I’ve been heavy on the ‘longest night’ part of reflecting upon life’s unfolding during the winter solstice. So herein I am pondering more of the ‘shortest day’ side of things.

I like sitting this side of the solstice – winter’s frozen heartbeat on the cusp of a new beginning. Almost but not quite on the other side of darkness.

Bright spots. Glimmers. Slanting, lingering glow-rays.

Those are the things any day can bring – and are especially darkness busting on The Shortest Day.

Offerings I grasp onto, hoping to not miss any scrap of sunshine put out there to encourage me along the way through.

This year’s ‘shortest day’ forced its way into my brain. Insisting I pause, recognize and think on the myriad kaleidoscope bright spots, glimmers and slanting glow-rays of MMXXI.

From getting vaxxed, which enabled something as simple as getting a haircut and grabbing my first coffee at the new shop in town, to meeting up with a quilter-blogger buddy for the first time face-to-face at her home (and fantastic quilting studio) in NC. Plus numerous road trips made to Michigan and Chicago…mostly for fun, family gatherings, but also one that included sharing the grief with family due to the passing of my Aunt Adua.

In many cases, what was interrupted by 2020’s COVID crisis began to re-start this year in different ways…for our son that meant ‘how to get engaged, married and go on a honeymoon’ during a Pandemic. The beginning of the Pandemic caught him and his girlfriend hiking the Patagonia wilderness – a miracle story in and of itself of how they even got back on American soil…They are now honeymooning in Thailand.

🙂

In conclusion (!), the following just seems to put ‘the shortest day’ and ‘the longest night’ into a sort of musical representation of what I’m trying to convey in this winter solstice pondering – give it a listen.